I've been having horrible, horrible daydreams lately.

I've been worrying about our trip to Johnstown this weekend.  Worried that it would snow.  Worried that travel would be horrid.  Ice everywhere.  Blizzard conditions.  Travel advisories.  Tornados and earthquakes.

I spend too much time thinking about it.  But I probably should have spent a little more time with Abby this morning.  Or last night.  Or this week.

Maybe all of this is just symptomatic of the season.  Being locked indoors all the time by the cold.  We need to get out to a nice warm locale.  For a month or more.  Maybe somewhere with a beach.  Somewhere happy and forgetful.

And I get so bitter thinking of Johnstown and weddings and how we risk our lives travelling in snow and other lousy weather every time we go out there.  Do they even realize it?  Why do they decide not to visit us?  Or decide not to show up because of something petty that doesn't involve us?

I'm not trying to shirk off family obligations.  I just want some credit for the regular danger we throw ourselves in every time.  The family that I helped assemble and care most about.  Do they give out medals or something?

So I know there are three huge snowstorms heading here.  And I'm missing work and I'm taking time out to keep my family as safe as I can.  And the little things become more irritating because there's nothing I can do about the big things.  Dumb camera.  Darn it, no hat.  Where's my stinking left shoe?

But it's likely that everyone will make it back in one piece and we'll be expected to gear up for the next one when it rolls around.  Until the odds play out and I'm left with nothing because of some stupid one-use tailor-made dress.

Hopefully the next one is in summer.