Asymptomatic

There must be intelligent life down here

Collection

A short ride down the hillside into the hallow we found a quaint two-story house, unoccupied yet accompanied by the realtor and her blue station wagon. She waited for us on the dirt path leading up to the porch from the patchy stone drive. She was curious, as they all are when we go hunting, what interest we would have in such a house as this.

The exterior was unusual for the type of home we usually search out, and I was fearful that we had wasted our trip. In the lawn of scrub grass we found the large rusted rim of a large vehicle that had at one time served as a planter, but now made itself home for only the most hardy weeds that grow in this brisk mid-October climate. Only a few odd adornments littered the outer walls of the house near its cinder block pilings - a one-wheeled and tubeless bicycle, several cans of obviously unused all-weather paint, three sledgehammer handles.

I Should Be Quarantined

I ended Friday with a bit of a cold and sore throat, and now I’m once again oozing from various orifices. Of particular concern to me at the moment is my nearly completely blocked sinuses, which allow just enough air to pass to remind me that I’m sick.

Even so, the weekend wasn’t so bad.

Keep Santa Airborne

This year’s already typically smally crop of magic corn feed shrunk even more as a result of the strange greenhouse-effect climate changes. Being that the magic corn feed is in atypically short support supply, Santa needs to budget his flying feed appropriately so that he can stay aloft for the entire evening of toy delivery.

A fact of reindeer flight that is not too well known is that it only takes three of the reindeer to move Santa and his sleigh full of toys through the sky at any given time. The other reindeer use this time to rest while still keeping aloft with the residual effects of the magic feed, but are not actually pulling the sled. Due to this, Santa figures he can budget the use of his magic corn feed to time it perfectly to coincide with these rest periods. But how?

Lateral Thoughts

I hate lateral thinking.  The answers to the puzzles usually don’t
make any sense.  How can you answer a question when all of the facts
aren’t presented to you in the beginning?  There are a couple that
make some sense, though.  Here’s one that isn’t too bad:

A man lives in an apartment on the 35th floor.  He gets in the
elevator to leave his building for work.  He hits the button for the
first floor, gets off there and goes to his office.  At the end of
the work day, he returns home, gets in the elevator and hits the button
for the 32nd floor.  He gets off on the 32nd floor and takes the
three flights of stairs to his apartment.  If he didn’t do it for the
exercise, why did he get off the elevator to take the stairs up?